“It's never too soon, nor too late, to follow your passion.” - Shann Vander Leek

I woke up in a dreadful fury. The red light on the alarm clock glared at me: 5:30 a.m. A few more minutes of sleep was all I wanted—anything to put off going back to the office.

Does this sound like your average day? It used to be mine.

For many years, I had enjoyed my job, but now it felt more like a prison sentence, and I knew I had to find a way to escape. Somewhere along the way, the corporate culture I was immersed in had changed to a game of ego-driven micro-management, and I began to experience a slow and certain suffocation.

It was time to get real, face my fears, develop a critical path to transition, and become the mistress of my own destiny.  But how?

I was already getting several strong signals that it was time to make a change, but I guess it’s hard to recognize when you’re just “bumping around” while you’re still bumping around. I remember feeling confused, fearful, angry and scattered.  The pain of an uninspired work life lent itself to a reactionary autopilot protection program that only made things worse. I was just going through the motions, no longer feeling challenged by, or even interested in, the duties I once loved. Many days began with the dreaded alarm clock and a state of anxious dread. I was unnerved by the decisions my corporation was making, and felt like a fish out of water in what used to be a very comfortable environment. A recent regime change had taken me from a state of near autonomy to one of micro-scrutiny. In other words, I went from being the golden girl to a cover girl with a giant pimple. 

There was no way I was going to jump through flaming circus hoops just to get a paycheck. The job was killing my soul, and I needed to find a way out. 

I went through many phases of self-examination, doubt, fear, and suffering before I finally realized it was time for a significant change, but my epiphany came during an uncomfortable board meeting with our newly appointed, ego-driven, general manager. Just two years prior, I’d been rewarded with a trip to Scotland for my leadership efforts and double-digit revenue growth. But then, the economy tanked, and someone had to pay. That someone, apparently, was me. The game of the day was, “Break the sales manager, then build her up again.” Angry and out-of-control, I let him have it. It was not a pretty sight. And, I did it in front of several witnesses, all of whom were men. 

Ugh. It was a disaster… But I digress. On to the epiphany. 

While all of this madness was in progress, I happened to look out the window. All day, it had been dark and stormy—a perfect match for the climate in our boardroom—but now, one of the most marvelous rainbows I’ve ever seen was shimmering across the sky. I knew I was the only person in the room who could see it. It was as if it had appeared just for my eyes. 

At that moment, I knew I was going to move on, and that I was going to be okay. 

Today, I understand that without the extreme discomfort my former work environment caused, I might have never allowed myself to embrace my true passion and follow my dreams—but at the time, it was, to put it simply, hell. The first phase of any significant transition is very uncomfortable, and mine was no exception. An enormous shift was coming, and I could feel it. I could taste it. But even after I saw the rainbow, I couldn’t quite wrap my head around it. All I knew was that the more I tried to fight it, or think about things “logically,” the more I felt trapped in that place of discomfort. 

A large percentage of the eight-to-five workforce seem to have accustomed themselves to a certain amount of suffering. It’s as if people are trying to buy security with the currency of their own pain. But we can’t live for the promise of a day in the future. When I discovered that security was an illusion—that all my hard work and sacrifice hadn’t even bought me a place in the new corporate regime, let alone a ride to retirement—happiness became all that mattered. Did I want to spend my life making a life, I asked myself, or dancing in a cage for a paycheck? The answer that came to me was this: I was no longer willing to put my life on hold for the sake of a company I didn’t believe in.

Another sure sign of my need to transition was the feeling that I simply must make a difference in the world. The fat paychecks and benefits were no longer enough. A major turning point for me was my realization that selling television commercials does absolutely nothing meaningful for the world. Advertisers spend gobs of money to promote products like Viagra and Lipitor, so that the general public can keep an erection and eat cheeseburgers. Wow! When I stepped back to think about what my job really entailed, I discovered that I was no longer willing to be part of an organization which had no interest in a healthy corporate culture, which was teeming with politics, which had no interest in human kindness.

This wasn’t an easy truth to swallow: I had invested much of my life in the television advertising business, and I loved the game—until I didn’t anymore. Hey, people change.

To make my great escape, I had to focus on what I needed to get from Point A to Point B. I knew that I wanted to earn my professional coaching certification, and that I needed to get clear about my finances and save some money to cover household expenses before taking the leap. And that was pretty much it. I didn’t have a niche market. I didn’t have clients. I only had the knowledge that what I was doing wasn’t authentic to me anymore. 

I decided to take my time, so I could really wrap my head around the idea of leaving the only career I’d ever known. It was both amusing and disheartening to realize that all my dedication, smart work, and energy—all the things I put into my career every day—were given only for the sake of receiving a paycheck, but this awareness helped cement my corporate world exit strategy. I had to let go of the illusion of control my leadership position and fat salary created. 

And so, after fourteen years with the same organization, and eighteen years in the television advertising industry, I found the courage to let go on my terms. I packed my box, said “so long” to the big bucks and my cushy expense account, turned in my pimped-out company SUV, and walked away from a career that no longer suited me. 

Today, I’m grateful beyond measure that I had the courage to follow my conviction. Letting go of my ties to the corporate world allowed me to create an international coaching business dedicated to supporting powerful women in transition who wish to accelerate life on their terms, and create more balance in their lives. All of the characteristics that made me a success in the advertising arena benefit me now as an entrepreneur. I have a healthy family life. I’ve traveled to many delightful places. I live in the home of my dreams. I’ve become a successful entrepreneur, yogini, and published author.  And I am eternally blessed to have the opportunity to be true to myself, follow my dreams where they lead me, and support others as they do the same. 

Because it’s never too soon, or too late, to follow your passion.